Heavy
by la peite morte
Summary: I don't wanna lose you now, Gotta be someway, gotta be somehow, Would you reconsider if I said I'd change? If it gets too heavy, I'll carry the weight. The night Ethan leaves but will Leah come with him. Lyrics from David nail and the well ravens song heavy.


**I don't wanna lose you now**

 **Gotta be someway, gotta be somehow**

 **Would you reconsider if I said I'd change?**

 **If it gets too heavy, I'll carry the weight**

"I need to go home" a voice came from behind Leah Lewis-Hall, Leah turned around in the

darkness outside her door, to the voice of Ethan Longacre her long time boyfriend. "What?"

she said after a consiterable silence, "I need to go home" he said, Leah noticed as he came

into the dim light of the room that he had traded his jeans and tee shirt for his home

spunshirt and trousers.

"But you are home. Th-th-this is your home" Leah stuttered, she felt her heart begin to crack.

Leah felt a warm hand on her shoulder, "No this is your home." he said calmly. she knew

deep down that he was Amish and that she was English, it would have never worked out, but

losing Ethan and Neil so close together seemed too much. "Stay" she whispered her voice

listless, "I need you" tears began to roll down her face. Ethan touched her face, "No you want

me, you dont need me" Leah shook her head, "I need you, Neil's death is so fresh and yet you

stand here and abandon me". Ethan shook his head, "I am not abandoning you Leah, I am

needed at home, I've seen your world, the violence the hate and my heart can not bear it."

Leah knew it was true her and Ethan were worlds apart, but she hadnt felt a difference this

big until now.

 **I know it's me, the reason why**

 **We've come unraveled too many times**

 **I don't know the answer, try anything**

 **To bring us back to how we used to be**

Ethan took her hand and lead her outside on to the porch, he scooped up some

dirt in his hands and held it out to her, "My father taught me the love of the land" he mused

as dirt slid through his fingers, "The harvest is getting ready to come in my father needs me

for the work" He turned and faced Leah, "I am meant to be in my world, I was unsure who i

was but now i am not" he took her hands, "Because of you i've learned where i belong" Leah

pulled away she hurt too much, sliding to the ground she listened to her heart beat as tears

fell down her cheeks dotting the dirt in a darker color. "Say something My Leah" He knelt

beside her, she looked up at him through tears, _what do you want me to say_ she thought, _my_

 _heart is breaking, we dont belong in eachothers world and yet we fell in love what a cruel trick._

"How are you going to get home" she swallowed back tears. "I will take a bus to Indy and

catch a ride with a farmer from there" Leah shook her head, "No, I'll drive you home, go get

your things" Ethan turned and walked into the house, Leah hung her head and continued to

weep. Leah started her car, Ethan came around to the driver side, "May i drive, it'll be my last

time" Leah sighed and got up from the drivers seat and moved around the car to the

passengers seat, they took off. Rain gently tapped aginst the window echoing the storm

inside Leah's heart. Leah stared out as the blur passing in the windows. Leah leaned her head

aginst the cold glass, a hand took her's, tears streamed down her face it was reassuring yet

heart breaking. Hours passed like minutes, It was five am when they pulled up to the

farmhouse the sky was a pale pink, lights in the window showed the house was rising, Leah

stepped out of the car and leaned against the hood, "Oh My Leah I miss you already"

"You'll get over it she squeezed her eyes shut the pain hurt, "your fling is over you'll be

baptized and within a few years marry an Amish girl"

"You weren't part of my fling Leah you were part of my life" he said fiercely, "you're part of

my life" he said quietly, he reached out for her, "I love you and I'll never forget you,

until angels close my eyes" he whispered, she wanted to push him away she wanted to hold

him close, Leah bit her lip and put her face in her hands and sobbed.

 **I don't wanna lose you now**

 **Gotta be someway, gotta be somehow**

 **Would you reconsider if I said I'd change?**

 **If it gets too heavy, I'll carry the weight**

"Go, Go home" Leah said through tears, she wished she could take the words back, Ethan

looked at her, touching her face he took her hand in his and leaned in close, "Come with me."

He whispered.

Leah watched Ethan climbed over the split railed fence.


End file.
